


Hello

by ChokolatteJedi



Series: Fallen Fics [6]
Category: Fallen (Album), Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Angst, Dark, F/M, Hogwarts Third Year, Insanity, M/M, Pre - Goblet of Fire, Songfic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2006-05-26
Updated: 2006-05-26
Packaged: 2017-10-14 04:56:37
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 557
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/145601
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ChokolatteJedi/pseuds/ChokolatteJedi
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Siri’s thoughts in Azkaban</p>
            </blockquote>





	Hello

**Author's Note:**

> Beta'd, as always, by the wonderful My Sweet Koinu

**Playground school bell rings - again  
Rain clouds come to play again  
Has no one told you she's not breathing?  
Hello, I'm your mind giving you someone to talk to  
Hello  
**  
He knew the dimensions of his cell were five steps by five steps.  
He knew that he had to find a rat.  
He knew that he was innocent.

Those three things Sirius knew were true. Everything else he wasn’t sure if he dreamed or lived, remembered or watched. Sometimes he was a dog, sometimes a man. Some days the dementors would sweep past his cell followed by any icy rain that never ended. Some nights the prisoner across the way would cry out in his sleep. Sometimes there were visitors. Sometimes there was food.

But his cell was always five steps by five, he had a mission, and he was innocent.

Lily would come to visit him, but she would always just curl up on the floor, her arms wrapped around a blue blanket. James did the same thing, lying with his arms spread out and his eyes open. Remy would come and kiss him like he used to, but then the moon would rise and he would run and Siri could never remember why. And Peter would turn into a rat, and then a man, and back again. Peter who had thrice denied and twice defiled. Sirius had a rat to catch.  
 **  
If I smile and don't - believe  
Soon I know I'll wake from this dream  
Don't try to fix me I'm not broken  
Hello, I'm the lie living for you so you can hide  
Don't cry  
**  
They told Siri he was a betrayer, a murderer, a liar. They told Siri they were going to lock him up, going to kill him, going to get him help. Siri just laughed. It was laugh or go mad from the kisses and the lies and the rain and the damn five by five.

Footsteps came and he was a man, at least he imagined he was. Questions again but always the same. And Lily wouldn’t wake and Remy ran away when the bell rang. Why and Why and Why was all they asked and never liked the answers. But there was a picture of a rat and Siri remembered.

He was innocent. They thought he was crazy or they thought he was dying. They thought he was a killer or they thought he was lying. He couldn’t make up his mind which to be. But all of it was lies.

Five steps to Lily who wouldn’t wake. But he was innocent and now a dog. And freedom was impossible but not for him because he had a mission.  
 **  
Suddenly I know I'm not sleeping  
Hello, I'm still here  
All that's left of yesterday  
**  
As he swam further away from the rock fortress, Siri’s mind began to break free of the constant rain. He had a name and a mission and a destination. Lily and James and Remy were gone, but he had a godson to protect and he knew the truth.

Dreams separated from wishes and reality. Nightmares were pushed back into the realm of the imagination. Feelings and five senses returned. He now remembered everything, including three truths.

He knew he was innocent.  
He knew he had to find the rat.  
He knew his mind was free.


End file.
